What Does Having Sex Mean to You? Here are the tips you need to know @ Grade Writes

What Does Having Sex Mean to You? @Grade Writes
Sex means different things to different people, and

There are two basic reasons that people want to have sex:

1. To get something
2. To share love, passion, warmth and connection


Sex to Get Something

If you are in a relationship where you want sex and your partner doesn't, think for a moment about WHY you want or need to have sex. See if you relate to any of these.

I need to have sex to:

Release sexual tension.
Feel that I'm adequate -- not a loser.
Feel happy.
Feel loved and lovable.
Feel connected with my partner.
Release stress.
Be able to sleep.
Feel powerful and in control.
Feel safe.
Feel validated.
Feel whole.
Get filled up inside.
When you approach your partner from a place of wanting to get something, you are coming from a needy state. Your neediness is likely not attractive to your partner, nor erotic for your partner. Your neediness may result in your partner feeling used rather than aroused.

Sex to Share Love, Passion, Warmth and Connection

Wanting sex to share love comes from a completely different place inside than sex to get something. In order to have love and connection to share, you have to already be connected with yourself and feel filled with love. You cannot share something that you don't already have.

You cannot share love and connection when you feel unhappy, empty, inadequate, unlovable, disconnected from yourself, stressed or agitated, angry or needing.
@Grade Writes

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